Tuesday, January 03, 2012

2012 Goals- Parenting

You would think that since this the area in which I spend the most time that I would naturally be the most successful.  Quite the contrary, most of the time I feel like an "epic failure" (borrowing a much used quite of DS16).  I think i wake up every morning saying this is the day i will keep my cool, this is the day i will not raise my voice, this is the day I will not be bothered by the little things.  Then I get out of bed.  lol.  Seriously, some days it is like that and other days have their magical moments. 

All of the kids are reading Making Brothers and Sisters Best friends for school, or as I like to refer to the book when i am hunting it down, Making Brothers and Sisters be Quiet, or making Brothers and Sisters Get Along Before Mom Shoots Them.  I think if I could end all the sibling bickering then peace would not only resonate through me, but resonate through my entire home.  I think they live to torture each other some times.  Thinking, back i did the same thing to my brother ;) 

So as far as resolutions regarding my parenting I have the following goals for the year all of which will lead the a perfect happy home, or at least a few minutes of peace.

1) Continue my non-fiction reading schedule for Wednesday which focuses on parenting.  My current reads for this area are The Power of Motherhood by Nancy Campbell and The Power of a Praying Parent by Stormie Ormartian. 

2) Leave love notes for my kiddos each week.  While I verbalize it every day, I want them to have it in writing too.  These notes will include lots of praises because I am honestly horrible at that.
 - I am planning on writing them a note each Wednesday and putting them at their spots at the dining room table. 
- I am going to try and find nice little love letter boxes like I have for Hubby too. 

3) Be more consistent.
- Be consistent in my praises
-Be consistent in my discipline (will be implementing a new 3 strikes your out discipline system). 

4) Be purposeful in having fun with them. 
-I like our family time to be engaging and fun.  We also like to watch movies.  We need a balance.
-The kids and the family got new games for Christmas.  I need to have plan regular family time where we play our games.  We use to be very consistent about this and then life got in the way.  This year I am putting it on the calendar. 

5) have more one on one time with each child
-even if I just get to go sit in their room alone with them or invite them into my room, I want some more alone time with my kiddos.  Meeting them at their level.  Just a few minutes of quiet uninterrupted quality time. 
- I am putting this on my calendar too.  If I can give fb one on one time every day (even if for a few minutes) I can certainly give my kids one on one time as well. 

I know as we settle into our new place things will calm down on its own.  I know as We become more and more consistent in both routine, praises and discipline things will calm down.  i am looking forward to a fun joyful year with these children whom the Lord has blessed me with. 

Sunday, January 01, 2012

2012 Goals- Marriage

Second to God the most important people in my life are my husband and children which is why make goals to improve my relationship with them.

My husband and I are very close.  He is my best friend.  But like any other relationship, it could stand to make some improvements.  Many times we get caught up in our daily lives and in the duties of parenting and we leave little time to focus on being an actual couple.  This year, I am hoping that if I set some specific goals and therefore making achieving my goals a priority, we will have more time together and further strengthen our relationship. 

The last time Mike and I have gotten away for a vacation was August 2006.  We went to a marriage conference for adoptive parents.  We were in classes all day but we still had a relaxing time at a hotel.  The time before that was may 2004.  We went to a bed and breakfast for the weekend and it was amazing.  To say that we need a break is an understatement. 

Marriage Goals:

1) Have regular dates with Mike
- plan out a date each month with ideas i come up with on my own or ideas from www.datingdivas.com or even pinterest
- have at least one date per month that cost us nothing but time.

2) get away for the weekend with Mike
-this is going to take some strategic planning but I know it will be worth it.
-we really love going to B&Bs so it will probably be something to that effect- find a location by 2/13/2012 and give this to him as his gift for Valentines Day
-plan childcare for our two youngest children and find friends for our oldest two to hang out with for the weekend.   
- pick out a new game for us to take with us for the weekend.  We love to play games.  The last time we went to a B&B we played Upwords all weekend long and loved it.  Well and other things too- we are married after all.

3) leave Mike love notes each week
-a friend gave me a cute little hinged box that says "love notes" on the outside so each week I am going to leave Mike a love note.  I am going to place the box on his pillow so he will know he has a new note.  If he decides to reciprocate then great, but if not I am perfectly ok with that too.  That is not my love language so no biggy : )  (Mine is acts of service)
-I am going to focus on things to praise him for because I openly admit I am not very good at praises. Fault pointing, no problem, praises...  Since I know I'm the one with the biggest fault in this scenario it is something that I want to work on diligently with my Husband and my children. 

4) I will continue in my non-fiction reading selection for 2012. I focus on marriage on Tuesday and right now I am reading Created to Be His Helpmeet by Debi Pearl and The Power of a Praying wife by Stormie Ormatian. 

I am just tweaking here and spicing things up a bit.  My marriage doesn't need an overhaul, just a bit of a boost.  I know if I work hard at these three goals we will be beaming at each other at the end of 2012.